StormPooper

"I knew I shouldn't have drank the water on Tatooine..."

Music Video of the Month

Important Procedural Documentation

Lecturer Gaye Kyle provides detailed instructions on How to Perform a Digital Removal of Faeces.

The highlights:

• Inform patient of imminent examination
  
• Insert non-latex gloved, lubricated index finger slowly and gently, encouraging the patient to relax. Use one finger only.
  
• In scybala type stool is present (Bristol stool scale type-1) remove one lump at a time until no more faecal matter can be felt.
  
• In the case of a solid faecal mass, push the finger into the middle of the mass, split it and remove small pieces with hooked finger until no more faecal matter can be felt.
  
• If the faecal mass is too hard, larger than 4cm across and is impossible to break up, STOP and refer to the medical team for a possible digital removal of faeces under general anaesthetic.

Santorum 2012

In response to this article, Shitterbug would officially like to wish former Senator Rick Santorum a happy bid for President of the United States, should he so choose to run in 2012.

The Circle of Life

How come they never include this endearing story in Disney animated features? They show the mother robin feeding the chicks, but what about the rest of the story shared by The 15 Minute Lunch?

Robbers distract victims with feces in Toronto

AP

TORONTO — Toronto police say robbers are squirting people with feces at cash machines to distract them before stealing their money.

Constable Tony Vella said Friday that the robbers use squeeze bottles to squirt the victims who are making cash withdrawals. The offenders then help them clean the feces off their clothing, and in the process, they steal their money.

Vella said the robberies have happened four times in downtown Toronto in the past week.

He explained that in groups of four, one person squirts the victim's clothing, another points out the offending spot, a third person tries to remove it and the fourth person grabs the cash.

Exit Strategy

From Flowing Data:

If my wife, the physician, has taught me anything, it's that everything that has to do with the human body has a medical term or classification for it - and I mean everything. The other day she came home and asked, "Have you ever heard of the Bristol Stool Chart?" I hadn't, so she described. It's classifications for dootie. I thought it was a joke, but there's a Wikipedia entry for it. Ergo, it must be true.